Every now and again, you come across a fashion item that is just flat out life-changing. Eye-roll, I know. Is fashion ever really life-changing? Of course not, I’m being dramatic for emphasis, BUT, there are those few items that you encounter in life—the worn-in-to-perfection pair of vintage Levi’s, the comfiest loafers ever, or the absolutely made-for-you white tee—that really do transform your personal style game. And maybe it’s not so much due to the exact item itself, but rather the way it makes you feel while wearing it. The way it allows you to fully own yourself and enter into the best version of you. And even the way it opens up doors in your closet, presents styling options, and shifts your attitude.
Some such witchcraft recently happened to me with a $20 button-down shirt from…wait for it…Aerie.

Before I get into this shirt’s many, many merits…let me recount how we got here.
UNTUCKIT
For a while now, I’ve been feeling an unidentified irk about button-down shirts. They’re an absolute staple in my wardrobe, and I own FAR more than is probably prudent. When in doubt, I always reach for one — tbh, likely more than I reach for a white tee. They’re truly my wardrobe security blanket.
But as I said, I’ve been feeling a bit unsettled about them. To be clear, this nagging wasn’t necessarily about finding “the one”— I already own plenty of amazing shirts: the Jamie Haller Essential Denim Shirt, the Apiece Apart Aldea Shirt, the J.Crew Etienne Shirt, and my absolute holy grail of shirts: A pistachio and eggplant subtly striped mastery from the Queen of Shirts herself, Olivia Villanti of Chava Studio. I’ve worked long and hard to achieve a shirting wardrobe that speaks to both my needs and style, and I adore every single one of these shirts.
So if this irk wasn’t about the lack of a good button-down shirt, I realized it must be about how I was wearing and styling them. Truth be told, I’d grown a little tired of my go-to move of always half-tucking the front. But I love this styling trick, and I will never stop French tucking — that would be blasphemy to my millennial heart! So in an effort to solve my distress, I watched
’s brilliant recent video on shirt tucking for renewed inspo, which she doled out in gorgeous spades. Despite her genius hacks and methods, I was still stuck. On the whole, the front tuck was starting to feel a bit boring to me? Expected? Sometimes even crumpled or messy?One day, I popped over to Pinterest to do some research for a different letter…and I accidentally clicked into my evergreen “Spring Fashion” folder. I did a quick glance-through, and ALL I COULD SEE were untucked button-down shirts for as far as the eye could travel. It was glaring, in fact, how clearly my recent pins had all been of this same persuasion. And it was only when I looked at the board with fresh eyes did I realize this subconscious penchant…no—screaming inner desire—I’d been harboring to wear untucked shirts!
But guys…old habits die hard. Every single friggin’ time I put on a button-down shirt with a pair of jeans, trousers, or shorts as of late, I reflexively reached for the hem and did my half tuck shimmy. (It’s honestly like an addiction…?!) I even went so far one day as to force myself to leave the house with my shirt untucked, only to get to the office, go to the restroom and sneak a peek of myself in the full-length to immediately decide “F this,” and half tuck that puppy right back in. SIGH.
Then something magical happened. Magic by the way of one of my Internet friends (and many of yours)
. Her now-viral post on button down shirts was not only informative, interesting and intoxicating (err, how many of us went down that Laura Harrier blue button-down Google search rabbit hole?! Show of hands!)—BUT also inspired a newfound bravery in me. A spunky determination I haven’t felt since my early NYC years, when I attacked fashion challenges head-on and pushed my styling experiments to the limit, bc, well I was a little fearless.But here is where the story parallel paths with another fashion obsession I recently had and have since realized: that of acquiring a lavender button-down shirt. (Sorry for the sharp left turn, stay with me!)
LAVENDER HAZE
As you all know by now, I have a thing for color. From powder pink to orange handbags to barely there LaCroix-inspired shades of blue, I love incorporating color into my wardrobe where I can. My most recent random fixation (bc I have many!!!) was a lilac button-down shirt. In fact, I mentioned this in my interview with
a few weeks back, so it’s been an ongoing mission. I initially started my hunt via TRR, namely through Charvet. The brand is known for its impeccable shirts, and for some reason, lavender shirting is very popular in menswear, so I thought it would be relatively easy to snag one there.After a few weeks of checking TRR every day to no avail, I started to give up…and went to Google for an answer. Up popped an ad for a lilac oversized shirt from Aerie, of all places,
’s Gen-Z loungewear vertical. Now don’t get me wrong, I love a good mall brand and I’ve shopped at Aerie before, but mainly for things like sweatshirts or coverups..not shirting. And when I clicked through to the site, I saw the shirt merchandised as exactly that: a coverup. Misaligned e-commerce styling aside, everything about it looked good: 100% cotton poplin, oversized fit, the color was right, and there was even a subtle stripe. The kicker? It was on sale for $20. I figured, why not, worth a shot.
A GOOD DAY INDEED
Here is where the stories converge, bc this Aerie Good Day Button Down Shirt has seemingly become the unexpected unlock in my ability to wear shirts untucked with ease. Confounded by how this one shirt suddenly opened this jammed door for me, I set myself to figuring out why. What about this exact shirt made me finallllly able to wear untucked shirts with confidence?! Bc if I could break it down into its components, maybe I could find other shirts with similar elements to expand my horizons, right?! Here’s what I uncovered:
Fabric Weight
We talk a lot about fabric in all aspects of clothing, and shirting is no different.
covered it beautifully in her post so I won’t repeat her great tips. Instead, I want to focus on fabric WEIGHT. She touched on this too, but let’s take a deeper dive bc I think it’s the reason this shirt is so brilliant.This Aerie shirt is one of the airiest, lightest-weight shirts I own. I actually should apologize for coming after Aerie for styling it as a coverup, bc it works brilliantly for that purpose. It’s an exceptionally thin & wispy cotton poplin, which means it never droops, feels heavy or ‘settles’ when you’re wearing it. I’m not religious, but I’ve often heard the adage repeated at Catholic schools during co-ed dances: “Leave room for Jesus.” Well friends, this shirt leaves room for Jesus. It lightly ‘sits’ on my body like a cloud, with plenty of “air” in between it and my skin, which means it feels floaty…almost like I’m not wearing a shirt at all. I realized this phantom vibe it creates mimics that of the “slim” concept from Tibi’s “Big, Skin, Slim” approach to styling. It’s not actually slim, but it feels slim due to it’s insanely light weight. Which is partly why I feel better about wearing it untucked.

Shape/Size

The second revelation I had about this shirt—which is definitely one I’ll be applying to future purchases—is around the concept of “oversized.” Many times, we think oversized is just sizing up one or buying a shirt labeled as “oversized” in our regular size. But one size up is not enough! In order to achieve Olsen-levels of NGAF, we need to size way, WAY up. I’m talking two, sometimes even three or…gasp…FOUR sizes up (depending on the shirt!) You may think this sounds insane, but I swear this is a big part of why this Aerie shirt resonated the way it did. It’s also why men’s shirts often fit so well.
Now in this case, the Aerie shirt is already very oversized, so instead of sticking with my usual size small, I knew sizing up just one would do the trick. But in looking at my shirt collection after having this realization, I noticed that many of the other shirts I ‘sized up’ on in the past were just a little oversized, not necessarily exaggerated enough to give me the laid-back, louche vibe I’ve been craving all over my Pinterest board. Exhibit A above.
So, after analyzing this shirt to an inch of its life…I did what any normal, rationally-minded, red-blooded fashion obsessive would do: I bought two more.

Other Details
Meticulousness is the name of this spelunking game, so I’m honing in on two more elements that make this shirt sing for me. One is the button placement on the cuff. I realized I appreciate one button on the cuff and one button on the sleeve placket best. This is the sturdiest type of cuff in that when I go to roll it up, I unbutton the cuff button but leave the sleeve placket buttoned. This means it sits more firmly rolled up on my arm and doesn’t slide down during the day. Not all shirts have this feature—so I know I’ll be searching for this type of cuff/button construction in the future when shopping.
The other detail is the side vent, which I truly love!! A good side vent not only allows for fluid movement in the shirt which in turn regulates the oversized vibe, but it’s also super handy on those days you do half-tuck bc it flows more easily on the side and back. For me, the deeper the side vent, the better! In fact, if you get a deep enough side vent that’s almost waist high, you can even string a belt under the back and over the front of shirt for extra zhush! The Aerie’s vent is not super deep but that’s ok; the light weight still provides a ton of movement, as mentioned. The mere fact that it has a decent side vent is a win!
THE LEARNINGS
Contrary to the overall message of this letter so far, I’m not here to try and convince you to buy this shirt. (I mean, I think you should, it’s a GREAT shirt—but that’s not so much the point!) The point is this shirt—and its elements—broke the ice in my closet and finally delivered me with a sense of confidence and comfort to wear my shirts however I dang well please—tucked, untucked, and everything in between. Once I applied the above learnings to my existing shirt collection, and honed in on the ones I owned that are better suited for untucking vs not, it opened up a whole new level of ease in my styling. In fact, up until this revelation, the shirts section of my closet was organized by color…not anymore! This exercise inspired me to reorganize my shirt rack by FUNCTION. So now, all my “untuckables” sit together while my “tuckables” hang out and gossip about how jealous they are of their brethren.
And sure, you can still totally half tuck this Aerie shirt, too! I’ve done so and loved it just as much, for many of the reasons stated above: the super thin fabric and side vent don’t create bulk when tucked-in and the extra “space” created from its airy volume contrasts nicely against the defined waist achieved from the half tuck.
The biggest learning of all though, is that we need to become fashion detectives. To really (I mean realllly) get to know our clothes, and the elements and details that make them work (or not work) for us. Your favorite pair of jeans — what about them is so special? Is it the exact spot they sit on your waist/hips? The cropped length or slouch on the leg? Your favorite tee — does the collar hit you just right? Are the sleeves the perfect length? Once we become our very own style sleuths, not only can we maximize possibilities in our wardrobes, but we’ll become much more astute shoppers, too.
So yes, this shirt is epic. And yes, for $20 I think you should consider buying it. But my so-called “life-changing” experience is not so much about this utterly perfect shirt, and instead about becoming my own fashion detective—which in turn has allowed me to feel more comfortable in what I wear and how I style it. Case in point - I’m now on an untucked spree!

Hungry for more?! Here are a few of my other favorite shirts that lend themselves well to the untucked life!

If you take anything from this letter, I hope it’s that sometimes, fine-tuning your personal style is about finding a holy-grail item that changes the way you get dressed and consider yourself. But I’d argue more often than not, developing a better understanding around the features of our clothes that deliver different functions for us is the true holy grail. This shirt wasn’t my savior—it was my mentor. It taught me how to embrace a silhouette I was itching to master but afraid of trying. And if you think about it that way, then yes — this $20 shirt was in fact, absolutely life-changing.
Thank you for reading - until next week! xx
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*It’s rare but occasionally brands send me gifts. I will always note these with an asterisk, but I would also never feature anything I don’t love and wear on the regular!
Thanks for the shout-out :))
When I want to leave the shirt out with no tuck, I may do a tiny side tuck to create the shape it would take on had I had my hand in my pocket.
I never knew others were as obsessed with shirts the way I am until reading this and Kelly’s post! Love this find