Is 2025 the Year of Intuitive Styling?
A case for listening more intently to our instincts
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My girlfriend Tracie is adorable. She’s the Sporty Spice of our BFF mom group, if you will. Always pulled together in Alo or Lulu, swimming 20 laps or doing hot yoga before 730am, all the while with the chicest “messy bun” that you will never even come close to emulating no matter how hard you try (and trust me, we’ve all tried). Tracie is also incredibly fit and healthy, and a huge proponent of the intuitive eating concept, which she’s been following like religion for as long as I can remember. In fact, she’s the one who introduced me to it years ago, and while I’ve always been intrigued by its principles, I’ve been slow getting on that particular bandwagon, at least in any major way.
(I promise this is NOT a “new year, new you” diet-related post so please bear with me for a moment while we make our way to fashion & style soon!)
Intuitive eating, for those unfamiliar, is a term coined by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch, both incredibly knowledgeable and sought-after nutritional therapists, authors, and leaders of this movement. (You can hear more from Elyse on one of my fave podcasts here.) In essence, intuitive eating is exactly what it sounds like: you listen to your body and eat what you want based on the signals it sends you. I’m simplifying it to its most basic terms, as there’s a TON of science behind it, but the drilled-down version is all about rejecting diets, food rules or preconceived notions of “healthy eating” and relying on your gut (both literally and figuratively) to make your food choices instead.
When you think about it, duh? We should all listen and respond to our bodies as a form of self-care and connection to our physiological senses. But of course, diet culture has pervaded so intensely, sometimes we can’t even hear what our own bodies are telling us. Harmful or aggressive external messages conflict with our internal signals, which can in turn dim our intuition to the point that our brains take over and direct us towards a silly fad diet or a version of healthy eating that may not actually work for our bodies.
I’ve long abolished the practice of diet-related resolutions each new year bc F that. Diet culture is OOC and we all need to find sustainable, life-long ways to make peace with our bodies and take care of our health. (If you do diet, this is no dis on you or anyone who does - we all approach our wellbeing differently and it’s deeply personal). But since we’re at the onset of a new year, I’ve been thinking a lot about healthy habits in general, as well as ways to make my life easier and stress-free.
As part of this quest to decrease my overall stress, I wrote last week about hitting reset on my personal style through the ‘Dry January’ lens of going back to basics and simplifying the process of getting dressed. But in undergoing that exercise, I had an entirely bigger revelation: I need to listen to my intuition more. Not only does this apply across the board in my life, but even more acutely to my personal style, shopping habits and approach to getting dressed. And that’s when I realized I was ripe for intuitive styling in 2025.
What is intuitive styling?
Intuitive styling, at least how I’m framing it, is very similar to intuitive eating in that it’s all about listening to yourself and trusting your gut. This may seem obvious, but frankly these days, I think it’s gotten away from most of us—myself included. And who could blame us? We’re all exposed to so many incredible ideas, frameworks, images, outfit formulas, etc all day long. (Especially on Substack, it’s a fountain of inspo! Read
’s post this week, ’s recent letter, and ’s 2025 wardrobe plan that ALL touch on this topic…birds of a feather, folks!) This is fantastic and we should absolutely continue absorbing new ways of thinking about personal style and getting dressed, as it’s all part of the evolution.But we’ve also seen how social media is contributing to the flattening of personal style across the board. Walk the streets of any major city, scroll Instagram or Pinterest for a few minutes and you’ll see the same capsule-ified wardrobe ideas over and over again, or the same 5 influencers hocking the same 3 items that brands are gifting and pushing at that given moment. And we’re all guilty of it! As a writer, I absolutely feed into trends and what everyone else is wearing bc I want to connect with my writers, be of the moment and stay relevant. As a consumer, I’m proud to have worked so hard on identifying my personal style, but at the end of the day, I’m only human; I want the f-ing Juju Vera Shell Necklace that every hot girl is sporting right now, too! So you see, it’s a cycle that’s neither good nor bad, it just is.
So how to break this cycle—or at least hit pause from time to time? We have to more intently listen to ourselves, look at our real lives, sit in our closets for periods of time, and intentionally approach our style intuitively based on who we are, what we desire and most importantly: how we feel. Here are some proactive steps I’m undertaking to start listening to my intuition more acutely in 2025.
Tip 1: Stop Overthinking It
I absolutely cackled with delight when I came across this from
’s post a couple weeks ago:OUT:
Over-optimization of personal style. NYC is full of phonies in 2k shoes with literally nowhere to live. The over-engineered, instructive, and prescriptive way we talk about “finding your style” like it’s just down a rabbit down a hole is silly. Your style is a lifelong journey; stop trying to optimize it. Some of y’all really look like Joey Tribiani.
I could not agree more! Generally speaking as women, we’re notorious for overthinking EVERYTHING. (My gnawing anxiety is proof). Fashion is no different. While I so appreciate all the thought-provoking ideas and foundations (esp here on Substack) that help educate, inspire and hone our personal style (which BTW, even this very post is attempting to do, so maybe just stop reading this and walk away?), we’re all thinking WAY TOO MUCH about something that should be less cerebral and more emotional. At the end of the day, fashion is a highly emotional endeavor, just as most creative things are. And this is to to be valued, treasured and deployed as such. Think about trying to make rhyme or reason of a Jackson Pollock—it’s a fool’s errand! Instead, we should listen to our hearts, bodies, and emotions while getting dressed to best guide us to an expression of our true selves that rings authentic to who we are as individuals.
Now of course we need parameters, ideas, and tools to help us along the way. Even the most gifted math students need calculators, pencils and rulers to solve complex equations. Resources like The Three Word Method, the Tibi glossary / color wheel, and wardrobe tracking apps like Indyx are excellent aids for leading us to a clearer vision of our personal style. But that’s all they are: resources. They’re not the “Fashion Bible,” they’re not our entire identity, and they’re most certainly not a prescription for how to get dressed every morning. Where’s the fun in that?
When we get too in our heads about something so emotional (guilty!), the result can be, well, clunky. And while I’ve certainly created some of my favorite outfits that feel 100% “me” by employing some of these tools, the main reason I loved those outfits is because they made me feel good. Again, we’re back to emotion, expression and intuition.
So what to do instead? Maybe we should stop thinking about our outfits, style, and shopping patterns and start feeling our way through our closets instead? It’s OK if you wake up one morning and want to dress like a sexy librarian and wake up the next morning and want to dress like a soccer mom. We contain multitudes! Not every outfit has to embody your three words or follow a color chart. We should give ourselves some grace to dress how we FEEL vs how we THINK.
Of course the big question is HOW? How do we approach intuitive styling and stop overthinking when getting dressed? Well if I gave you a roadmap, that would totally defeat the purpose of following your intuition now, wouldn’t it!? The “how” is going to be different for everyone. You may get dressed solely based on the weather or you may choose outfits from a hyper-emotional place. There’s no right or wrong answer here - only what your gut tells you to do.
For me at least, I lead with emotion (how am I feeling today/what mood am I in), selection (what pieces in my closet match this mood), utility (what’s the weather and where am I going) and finally inspo (did I see or read anything lately that could complement this current vibe I’m feeling). While I’ve broken this process down into “steps”—in reality, I’m not sitting in my closet every morning with my Notes app checking off the above list. Intuition is messy, amorphous and random…just go with it! Each morning might be different, but trusting your gut will always feel the same: right.
Tip 2: Step Away From Your Phone
As I said above, as much as I want you to keep reading this post, maybe don’t? Sometimes, too many voices in our heads are just that: too many voices. While I 100% advocate reading and absorbing fashion inspiration regularly (and I really do love it, esp here on SS!), it’s what we DO with the information that’s critical. Just bc XYZ influencer is telling us that “brown suede is totally in” doesn’t mean we have to run out and buy brown suede. Or just bc someone writes an incredibly eloquent and compelling post about how powder pink is the hot color for Spring 2025, doesn’t mean you immediately wear powder pink. ;) ;) You get my point. Staying connected and in the know is key; we don’t live in a vacuum. But knowing how to digest information for your very specific life is the critical part. Take what serves you from any given social media post, Substack article, TikTok trend (RIP) or NYT story, and leave what doesn’t behind. Trust your intuition—it’s your inner compass, give it the weight it deserves.
Tip 3: Delete Pinterest
Did I just hear an audible collective gasp? I said what I said! Another practice that can be at odds with intuitive styling is relying too heavily on Pinterest (or similar) for outfit inspo and replication. I’m super guilty of this too, so hear me out!
We all experience ruts when we can’t get out of our own heads long enough to put together “a great outfit.” We also (generally) all want to ‘fit in’ or at least partake in the dialogue. Outfit ‘copying’ is a turnkey way to handle these ruts and get dressed without too much effort or thought. Which hey, has its virtues! By copying the elements of an outfit you love, you can a) unlock new elements of your personal style you hadn’t before tapped into (win!) or b) end up looking like a watered-down version of someone you admire and don’t feel quite up to snuff (loss!) And yes, I’ve experienced both. So while the practice is not entirely devoid of benefits, it does tend to lead us down a path that can be less true to ourselves. This is also why so many of us are dressing alike and looking the same.
By deleting Pinterest (or at least taking a break), we’re daring to rely on our own instincts to guide our personal style and ultimately, get dressed in a way that feels good and true to us. And honestly, think about the liberation of this! I’d venture to say 85% of the time, it isn’t the exact outfit we pin that makes our heart skip a beat. Instead, likely the hair, body or makeup of the girl wearing it, the setting she was in, the expensive bag she was toting—a litany of uncopy-able essences that speak to an entirely different part of our psyche, which quite honestly has little to do with fashion itself. By walking away from direct outfit replication and listening to our intuition instead, we’re paying attention to ourselves—and not a stranger in a photo. Newsflash: you’re the one getting dressed, not her!
Am I being a bit extreme? Probs. There are plenty of inspired moments that come out of creating mood boards; it’s a helpful practice in refining our personal style, while creating ideas and themes to guide us. But that’s what it should remain: a mood. Not a copycat playground, nor an exact paint-by-numbers formula, and def not a step-by-step guide to getting dressed each morning. Now you could argue, “But Sogole, what if I just use a Pinterest image as a starting point bc my intuition is responding strongly to it?” GREAT! Go for it, girl. But (here’s the trick): only use it as a starting point. Find unique ways to make it yours, tweak it, and let it serve you. That’s how we leverage inspo imagery in a way that’s both intuitive and complementary to our personal style journeys.
Tip 4: Take Photos
I know many of us, especially those of us who are active on Substack or social media, regularly snap outfit selfies not only for content, but as an ongoing image library of looks we’ve created and love. Some others of us use Indyx or other wardrobe apps to catalog—and that’s fine too! Whatever your method, make it a habit to regularly record your outfits, esp the ones that make you feel great. Become your own Pinterest board! Once you do this, my bet is you’ll likely rely less on replicating the style of random strangers and more on copying and tweaking your past self. (A la
’s fab post this week!) And what could be more intuitive than that?!
Tip 5: Have Fun!
I say this so often, but fashion should be FUN! I know it’s fraught with so many complex issues: body image, affordability, inadequacy, imposter syndrome, the list goes on. These are real and important psychological demons we all contend with on a daily basis; I’m not diminishing them. But chances are if you’re reading this, you’re someone who’s dedicated to working through these issues and finding a path to your best self through expression of your personal style…and part of that means having fun with it all! As tricky as it may be at first, when we give into our intuition and dress in ways that make us feel good, those issues go by the wayside—even if just for a day. And then we can begin to experience the true confidence and JOY that comes with feeling like our most authentic, beautiful selves. I can’t tell you how to have fun in your own clothes— that’s all on you. But identifying the wardrobe pieces that bring you joy and leaning into those—even if it means wearing them multiple times in the same week, is a great starting point. As 90s icon Sheryl Crow once wisely sang, “If it makes you happy….it can’t be that baaaaddddddd!” So don’t forget to have fun with your style…and smile! (I’m so cheesy, but smiling always helps.)
Ok so maybe that was a lot to digest. And I’m sorry if at any point during my diatribe I came across like a stern headmistress demanding you get your homework done—mainly I’m squawking at myself to heed my own advice (I need a swift kick in the pants sometimes!) At the end of the day, we’re all products of the environments which we inhabit. So take comfort in the fact that your intuition is already fast at work, incorporating all the wonderful style inspo, ideas and methodologies that you’re consuming on the daily. It’s already happening! We don’t need to force it or push it in a direction it doesn’t want to go. If we all trust our gut, we will probs be happier —and more confident—with the result, bc it’s ultimately a reflection of who we are as individuals. We’re not Pinterest carbon copies, we’re not Instagram clones, and we’re most certainly not TikTok (RIP) wannabes. As one of my OTHER favorite 90s era artists Jewel once sang: “Follow your heart, your intuition, it will lead you in the right direction.” Sing it, girl! Yes it will. And so here’s to trusting our intuition more in 2025, leaving room for inspiration in a way that serves us positively and—eating whatever TF we want.
Thank you for reading and for being here! I so appreciate the support. I hope this was a helpful rant and that you’re inspired to follow your gut just a wee bit more after reading this. Would love to hear your thoughts so please drop them in the comments!
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Some very fun news! My little Substack had an exciting week, as my powder pink post was mentioned in the fashion industry’s go-to Bible these days, Puck’s Line Sheet, courtesy of our favorite ! Def go check it out when you can, and subscribe while you’re at it—it’s chock full of goodness 5x/week!
LA Fire Relief: Please consider donating to the Pasadena Humane Society, who is currently working hard to match lost pets to their owners.
Seriously though, should I buy the Juju Vera necklace? Send help.
When I tell you I think that image of the girl (is she known? I don’t recognize her) drinking coffee has been pinned by everyone I know who is into fashion and uses Pinterest, I am not kidding. That DAMN image has led me astray many a time over the years. I don’t look like her and that outfit won’t look like that on me, and that’s ok! Let’s throw that image in the bonfire hahaha.
Congratulations on getting mentioned in Puck! I love Fashion People maybe we’ll hear you on there as well sometime soon 🤞🤞. I also love your all yellow outfit! It’s bold and unique.
One thing I notice as well about the fashion cycle is how fast items get trendy. For example the Juju Vera necklace you mentioned. It’s beautiful and when I first saw it here and there I wanted it. But now I’ve seen it so often on so many influencers it feels trendy in an unappealing way. Like if I bought it I would just be a copier at this point which kind of makes me sad because I really like it! I think that also makes it hard for us to follow our intuition because we might honestly be drawn to something and then develop a distaste for it quickly if it suddenly becomes too trendy too fast. This can result in wasting a lot of money and I think also drives people away from their intuition and towards “classic” style, because while it can be boring it’s a way to avoid being caught on the speedy trend wheel. Those are my rambly early morning thoughts it’s such an interesting topic that deserves a lot of contemplation :)